i dont understand when someone ask me about my weds and i go answering im not free that i have syarahan to attend to, they'll go laughing.

still wondering why.

r:the least i could ask for you is to read bismillah with every step you make.
k:ok
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my fat demon is getting thinner and thinner by day and im happy about that. else, theres always downs to consider. someone not prepared yet to adapt even with slightest change. he thinks he demands so much, i demand too. i demand every sensible thing to have our rs healthier. every late night call has been the same not debates but unhappiness and its been taking a toll out of me. as a matter of fact, im sick of it. i really am.

" i will change for this rs. i will try by best ", then the next thing came smoothly" i said i will change.but you know its not easy. i will try to change but im not prepared yet. "
frankly saying, im left with ntg to say. im sick of it laaaaaa. fuck it.

im wiser now. wiser to differ all the good things and the not so good ones. well, im pleased to see myself enjoying syarahan. i missed last week's to celeb fiq's bday. then theres skewl next..i dont even know when skewl reopen if i'll still be going anot. neyttts.

did i mention, i called out khai's name as fik. siakkk. i dont even know why the name came out. nyeeeets.
still thinking about skewl. im no freaking mood to even wanna enter skewl. lucky theres coursemates to keep me occupied.

hp sucha bitch to me. fuck it. no singtel is.

its been straight nights sleeping in vain. what is a promise when you dont even mean it. why youre always sleeping in ease while im not. im not paranoidng myself but its you who i have to remind yet being neglected to as ur demand is reached. thinking sorry,again, is all is needed. much lesser than can be done.

lets wait for my luck to reversed back i guess.
so much happen, so much love i have for you tho.

wait, can i continue this....
can i honestly.

i had my phone at rest only at 3plus and had an early day to accompany yassy to the saloon. believe it not, he looks good with this hairstyle tho hes still not used to it. nyeeeets.

blog have ntg but only about abg ayeeee? nyets. yeah. another update, another him in it.
i freaking wasnt happy the fact with his obvious exposure of attitude towards me. only because i didnt wait for him to arrive and lunch tgt. my bad, really. it was but it slipped of my mind how his kind of person. he waits for someone and then eat tgt. thats exactly him. well, i forgot. and i blurted the words i hate to use the most, i dont know what to say to you anymore.but after some knocking of sense, i tot i shud be going after him when he left to purchase his soyamilk. i ran to him, apologising. i did. and that didnt help much.

he was all hungry at werk and only silent himself but refused to be read. even i tot he was still mad, others noticed. no he wasnt, he was hungry. i just could shake the guilt out of me. i really couldnt.

never sleep with an unselved matter. thats his motto. 
 no, perhaps a motto he develop for our rs. instead, we shared out tots abt the hideous day. him and me, we just had a too less likely to be even called un reasonable cold tiff. it was more to ugly nothing to be mad for.  what happened wasnt what we had in mind, it happened. he was upset and put it too much to heart that led himself so emotional. 
sorry was the answer then? but why sorrys and reflections end everything. why we tot we learn each unnecessary tiff but always tend to brings another.
if so, sorry isnt the word actually.

 
im not finding the real solution to it but im trying hard to make myself comforatble to ur gentle side.
im not good at consoling and using words to calm someone down, yet cautious enuf to not step to the muddy side sometimes.
still im glad i have you. you to be watering my fire even when its my fault. no,its we who completes our lack in both harsh and gentle side.

i love you also because u own what i dont, vice versa.
KR

everything turned out perfect tho plans were'nt supposed to be that way. but hell yeah, it was awesomely a beau for me, hunnybunny and others. thanks a zillion everyone. :)

the reservation was actually at 6pm but no one arrived there yet. i was still at the pet shop when the person rang me up.he wanted to go east coast so much so we headed to east coast to slack at the break water with soya milk in hand. talk about so many things. we only arrived at amirah's grill at 7.50pm i think. thanks to taking 197 we actually missed our stop cos we didnt know which stop to alight.  i held his hand and drag him to amirah's grill and climb up the stairs. the curtains were closed...and when i opened everyone went SURPRISE! and started singing the birthday song.
fuck, i was gonna cry ya know :D

after dinner we went to another place for sheesha. we got free apple tea la! the manager or somethigng was sooo friendly and asked were we celebrating borthday or something. dardar and qin got a bigger apple tea cup. and we got a small cup. tasted nice tho. me shared with dardar.:D dardar sooooo slenge. go consume too much then feel like vommiting till i got myself all worried for him. nyetttttts. cekik darah nyer anak :P
i love that he loved everything that day.

this was the card i made for him. it was freaking a last min one.took this halfway thru. i know la diff. but nvm la kannn:D he like one thing from the drawing. he likes his hair soo much! :p

Group photo at amirah's grill.

me and dardar..

the next thing i knew he sent me this post in my fb!<3